- The assignments the couples participate in to stay in the competition for 1 million dollars on TV are disgusting, but then my sit-ups don't seem that hard and awful anymore.
- At the cash register I tease Em about those clothing being just a huge expense and no investment, but then we all check the receipt and I get a 10 € pay-back because of the lady's mistake.
- An event from the past keeps invading my mind late in the evening when everyone else is asleep and I have the house all to myself. I decide to rewrite it, to create a different story. Eventually, I find myself brushing my teeth and having a monologue no one can hear, and it seems crazy, yet healing realizing I can finally express my feelings, and accept them.
Friday, July 26, 2013
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
- We watch the dairy worker stir the yoghurt with fruit from the window above, and it seems so creamy and yummy, just like in the commercials.
- The 10 degree temperature in the Hell underground cave feels like heaven on a blazing summer day, still in a short while we are glad we are wearing all the extra clothing.
- The second and third batch of coconut cookies turn out best: chewy on the inside and crunchy on the outside.
Monday, July 22, 2013
- I buy train tickets for our ride to Ptuj, and the cashier lady is nice to suggest we buy a special family card to cut on future rides which is tempting and makes me think of all the faraway places we could go... but actually we only take the train once a year... and this makes it a big summer adventure.
- Jay loves the view from the castle, particularly the brick roofs down below. She wants me to take a photo of her alone, and the roofs in the background.
- Jay and I clasp hands and laugh and make fun of Em while waiting for the train.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
- The writing prompt encourages me to create a poem. I haven't been writing much in months. Just lists. And all this writing feels good.
- I watch her play tennis with the teacher and hear her bold communication. An hour later I listen to her loud singing and see her twirl all around the house. The next minute she is telling me about the books for her school project that she will start working on. So full of life, so full of confidence.
- The second time that we watched the movie August Rush. I love this story about the music separating them and then eventually bringing them all back together.
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
- I know by now that a 1-hour workout a day, keeps my lowest spirits away, so I am back in business.
- Jay comes back in, asks for a container so that she can bring me something, a surprise. It is handful of thyme she had picked at the back of our house. “Are you surprised? Will you do something with it?”
- “I am so looking forward to next week when you’re home,” says Em with a big smile on her face.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
- Cranky in the morning. I choose not to serve breakfast. Pearl white nail polish. I feel so much better.
- I don't think Jay has ever asked for some more lettuce. Until lunch today.
- We are just about to cross the railway tracks when Jay says how funny it was last time when the signal started right then and scared us. To our amazement in that very moment the signal rings and we find ourselves in the exact same scene.
Monday, July 15, 2013
I read this post and decided it was a good day to get uncomfortable...
… like when I need to fill out the tax papers and the deadline is today.
Because I hate tax papers.
But I am grateful I have something to pay taxes for.
… and like when I have to take Em’s shoes back to the store to file a complaint.
Because I hate being the one to complain, to stand out; I’d rather just let go and blame it on myself for buying a low quality merchandise at a high price.
But I am grateful I did it.
And for taking the girls for the best ice-cream in town afterwards.
… and like when I have to insist on Jay’s sleeping in her own bed, in her room.
Because this happens 6 out of 7 nights (she made it a rule to sleep in the big bed on Fridays) and it stressful and it requires a parent’s persistence to stretch at the end of a long day.But I am grateful Jay eventually understands we all need a good night sleep and comes sneaking into the big bed no earlier than 3 a.m.